What happens at a Vietnamese wedding ceremony?
Vietnamese · also called le gia tien, dam hoi, Vietnamese tea ceremony
A Vietnamese wedding centres on le gia tien — the ceremony before the ancestral altar, held at each family's home. The groom's family arrives in procession carrying red lacquered boxes of gifts, and the couple asks permission of the ancestors before serving tea to the living elders.
The procession and the boxes
The groom's family arrives in a formal order, carrying an odd number of red lacquered boxes covered in red cloth - traditionally containing betel leaves and areca nuts, tea, wine, roast pig, sticky rice and fruit. Unmarried members of each family hand them across in a line, receiving lucky money in return.
The number of boxes is significant and varies by region: odd numbers in the north, often six in the south. Families agree the count in advance, and it is a genuine point of etiquette rather than decoration.
Before the ancestors, then the elders
The couple lights incense at the family altar and bows to the ancestors, asking permission and announcing the marriage. Only then do they serve tea to the living elders, who offer blessings and give jewellery or red envelopes in return.
The ao dai - the long silk tunic, usually red for the bride, often with a khan dong headpiece - is worn for this part of the day. Many couples change into Western dress for an evening reception.
Planning it properly
A tradition only goes well if the people running your day know it is coming. These are the things to say out loud, and who to say them to.
- Confirm the box count between families early
- It varies by region and is a real etiquette point. Agreeing it is a conversation between the two families, not a detail.
- Allow travel time between two homes
- Le gia tien traditionally happens at both families' houses. That is two ceremonies and a journey, and it shapes the whole morning.
- Tell your photographer about the altar and the incense
- Interior, low light, incense smoke, and a sequence of bows that happens once. They should know the order beforehand.
- Plan the ao dai change into the timeline
- Changing into and out of an ao dai with a headpiece takes real time, and many couples do it more than once.
Common questions
What is le gia tien?
The Vietnamese ancestral ceremony, held at the family home before the altar. The couple lights incense, bows and asks the ancestors' permission to marry, then serves tea to the living elders, who give blessings and gifts in return.
What is in the red boxes at a Vietnamese wedding?
Traditionally betel leaves and areca nuts, tea, wine, roast pig, sticky rice and fruit, carried by the groom's family in an odd number of red lacquered boxes. The count varies by region and is agreed between the families in advance.
What does a Vietnamese bride wear?
An ao dai, the long silk tunic, usually red for the ceremony and often with a khan dong headpiece. Many couples change into Western attire for an evening reception.
The vendors who make this work
Vietnamese wedding traditions depends on people who have done it before. Every review on Lazo comes from a couple who actually got married with that vendor, and rankings can't be bought.
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